“HAAAAHHHH!!!”
Kael screamed as he opened his eyes. Once again, his surroundings had changed. He was back in his room. His heart, however, was pounding non-stop. His body trembled, the feeling of lightning coursing through his entire body, tearing his flesh apart—it all still lingered in his mind.
Soon, however, as if he realized something and looked around, his eyes filled with horror.
“Cirri!”
He called out, scared and worried.
And there she was…
Little Cirri, sitting at the very corner of the room. Just like Kael, her body was trembling.
Her usual playfulness had disappeared. She didn’t rush towards Kael like she usually did. She didn’t call him out with that big wide smile on her face. She just… sat there, unmoving, her eyes hollow, traumatized even.
Igni was standing beside her. However, the Fire Dragon didn’t do anything to cheer his sister. He just stood in silence, making sure that his sister knew he was there for her. At the same time, he also made sure that the other two slept inside the Sanctuary.
“Cirri!”
Kael’s heart shattered, cursing himself in his mind.
How could he bring his 4-day-old daughter to such a dangerous place!?
It was foolish! It was absurd!
He rushed towards Cirri. His body—which still hadn’t forgotten the feeling of lightning that tore through him—stumbled the moment he moved.
“Fathe—”
Igni tried to call him, but Kael simply glared at him, silencing him in an instant. Yes, some of his anger was unfairly directed at Igni. He wasn’t in his best state of mind.
He only cared about Cirri and quickly picked her up.
“Cirri! Are you oka—”
He wanted to ask, his concern growing every second, but he froze.
Tears.
Cirri was crying.
Her eyes were moist, tears were rolling down her face. It was a sight that crushed Kael’s heart into millions of pieces.
“Cirri…”
He called out, his voice much weaker than before. He wanted to apologize, wanted to tell her that he was sorry for putting her through that nightmare. But before he could—
“Father, I’m sorry.”
She spoke up. Her voice was so small. So… fragile.
“…What?”
Kael blinked.
“It all happened because of me.”
Little Cirri began, her body trembling even more strongly.
“I was weak. I couldn’t help you. I came in brother’s stead because I was stubborn, and yet—I failed to protect you.”
Her voice cracked.
“I held you back instead… I should have known better. I should have done better—”
“Cirri!”
Kael raised his voice, cutting through her spiral of self-blame.
Before she could say another word, he hugged her as tightly as he could, pressing her trembling body against his chest.
“Shhhh…”
He whispered, gently stroking her back.
His heart ached at how small she felt in his arms. She was just a baby. She should be laughing, exploring, living her carefree days—not apologizing for something that wasn’t her fault.
“Are you alright?”
He asked again, his voice softer this time.
Cirri hesitated.
“…No. I’m weak—”
“You aren’t weak. It wasn’t your fault.”
Kael interrupted, silencing her as he continued to pat her back.
Cirri didn’t respond. Her little paws curled up, trying to hold Kael’s shirt, as if afraid that he would disappear. Then, her exhaustion got the better of her and soon, she closed her eyes and went out, asleep.
Hearing her snore, Kael didn’t move. He didn’t dare to. He continued to lightly pat her body, trying to make her feel safe and protected. The last thing he wanted was for Cirri to wake up from a nightmare. She needed to get some sleep—a good sleep.
A minute later, he felt a pat on his shoulder. It was Igni.
“Father…”
He called out with a guilty look on his face.
Kael, who looked into his eyes, sighed. He then rested his forehead on Igni’s and closed his eyes.
“It wasn’t your fault either, Igni. You didn’t know that only one of you could enter. I apologize for overreacting. I was scared and thought that Cirri was hurt.”
“Cirri won’t be hurt, Father. That dimension heals us when we return.”
Igni answered, closing his eyes as he felt his father’s unsettled emotions.
“She… is a child…”
Kael muttered in a weak voice.
“Having your flesh torn by lightning isn’t an experience a baby like her should be going through.”
He explained.
It wasn’t about physical wounds—those heal. Even his did. The problem was the mental trauma it left. Even now, Cirri’s body was trembling without stop. She wasn’t taking it well, and every time he thought about it, Kael cursed himself for being so irresponsible.
But then,
“I was surrounded by those wolves.
They couldn’t hurt me because of my scales, so they constantly attacked the back of my neck till my scale fell off and their claws plunged into my neck.
They were close to ripping my head off, and later, my entire body was scorched with flames and I was burned alive.
I was 17 days old, Father.”
Igni started, and Kael’s expression changed.
He moved away from Igni and stared at his child, but Igni didn’t stop. Rather, he asked a question.
“Do you know what hurt me the most?”
“…”
Kael didn’t even dare to ask what.
“It was the guilt I felt.”
Kael frowned at those words.
“I hated how all that happened because I did what I pleased and rushed towards those wolves instead of staying with you. I hated how I distanced myself from you in my arrogance, got surrounded, and then forced you to move.
My body still trembles in fear when I recall how that wolf tore your arm. I hated how you were in pain, all because of me.”
“It wasn’t your fau—”
“It was my fault, Father.”
Igni interrupted, looking right into Kael’s eyes.
He then glanced at his sister and,
“She feels the same.”
“…”
“She stubbornly walked into the Portal with you, and yet, she was absolutely useless inside. She came in because she wanted to help you, but she became a deadweight instead. She held you back, and you two were attacked by lightning.
She is a Dragon, Father. Lightning may kill her, but it will never leave a mental scar on her. The reason her body is trembling isn’t because she is scared of some mere lightning—it’s because she thinks she is the reason you were hurt.”
“But tha—”
Kael wanted to counter, but Igni suddenly smiled.
“It is your fault, really, Father.”
The Fire Dragon’s large eyes stared at his father and,
“You shower us with too much love, so every time you get hurt, we blame ourselves. And it crushes us when that blame is much stronger. So much that…”
Igni glanced at his sister and,
“We tremble in fear and guilt, even while we are asleep.”
