“Hmm… what should I wear? A normal dress? A merchant’s normal outfit? Should I just send them all away and have a private talk about us- ahem! No, Nolen… be patient.” ．
I sighed and a disappointed expression clouded my face.
Though I had an unparalleled degree of patience after working as a merchant for this long time, now… it was running low.
The pain in my heart was growing beyond my control.
Now I was afraid. In the end, I might have to think of the worst-case sicario.
But, that path was not something I could even think about.
The ‘what ifs’ would brake me, and I knew that very well.
‘Why did it have to be that beautiful son of a- no. Let’s not curse my only possible late mother-in-law.’
Everyone had scars and I had seen his. They were just glances but, even they were painful.
Those scars on one’s heart, I had seen his in those clear lonely eyes.
In his speech, he would brake suddenly without any reason.
His presence pushed away anyone getting near those deep scars.
I feared. It was something dark. Cold and… lonely.
I couldn’t shake this feeling that, if we were to get separated, if he were to get away, neither of us would be able to live normally.
Life will just have that ’emptiness’ if that really happened.
‘Hurry up… dummy.’
I stood by my large window, glancing at the lonely moon.
Though it looked like he had countless stars to talk with, it wasn’t true.
He was here and those twinkling little stars were far, far away.
He didn’t have anyone and, maybe he never will.
But, it might not be the case for me. I hoped.
“Moon… oh moon~. When do you think my time would come?
Or… are you enjoying seeing me like this?”
As if to have got caught, the bastard moon hid behind a large, gray cloud.
I sighed, deeply. Just standing by the window and staring at the ever-changing sky.
*
A person with a long beard and short hair looked up from the garden before the house.
A beautiful flower garden filled with different, beautiful plants.
Some of them had glowing flowers and leaves, enhancing the beauty of the large fountain in the middle.
His shining, blue eyes reflected the image of a beautiful, young maiden on the large window.
Her beautiful blond hair slowly danced with the cold night’s wind.
Though she looked stoic, her eyes contained sadness.
The seen… looked spectacular for anyone, from any angle.
“Young love… beautiful and yet, painful.”
He said softly as he sat beside another person.
With long, sea blue hair and light brown eyes, reflecting the light of the countless stars in the sky, she smiled and replied in a very soft as well as caring tone.
Filled with love and affection, her voice had some nostalgic feel to it.
“Reminds me of someone… right, Havi?”
“Definitely… a fool that knew nothing. Found someone… he still thinks, he is unworthy of.”
He smiled. A smile that could warm your heart. A smile that would make you feel at home.
Smile… as if your own parent.
She gently caressed his head. With those soft, smooth, gentle hands.
He smiled again, grabbing her hand and kissing it gently.
“She is tough. And that someone special to her… looks to be a fool.
A fool, to not understand the language of the heart.”
Though his words were harsh, his smile had gotten even more gentle than before.
“I think he is a good person.
And I’m very sure it won’t be like someone, who took three years~.”
Her eyes had unparalleled certainty. As if she knew anything would be much better than what they had.
“Haha…”
He softly laughed.
Even with his strong, large body, the air around him was unnaturally approachable.
“I hope.
She finally met the one. Her special someone.
Seeing my lovely, cold-hearted daughter being so warm… it makes me happy.”
He sighed with a smile.
Finally, he could be less worried now.
“Love changes people… reminds me of a certain someone.
One that, though took all the time in the world, changed so much that people sometimes forget the (Golden hammer) was also called (Tyrant of Maris).”
She chuckled. Reminiscing of those old days.
Nothing was like a present back in the times.
“Well… if the one waiting has that much patience, what else would you expect.”
He looked up, closing his eyes. He held her hand again. Interlocking his finger with hers.
She looked up, towards the window.
Now, no one was there. The beautiful maiden was gone. Her little maiden was gone.
“I have this feeling that… they will be together. Very soon.”
“Then I look forward to meeting that unlucky yet luckiest person.
He better be prepared for that day.”
He laughed. He was happy. He will be having fun with his future son-in-law.
She sighed as she looked at him.
“Please go easy on them. No… I will have to be there as well.”
She worriedly shook her head as she looked at his, a bit different smile.
He just smiled and stood up from the fine wooden bench.
“Let’s go in, my beloved Griz. These cold winds are jealous of us today.”
“You just…”
She sighed in defeat and took his hand.
***
In a fairly large room of a huge building, a tall man with glossy, shoulder-long hair stood by his bed.
Removing his plain white mask, he threw it on the bed. Revealing his beautiful face.
With his plain young face without any hair or impurities, he looked mouth-watering.
His ruby red eyes were chocolates on the cake.
He slowly opened his buttons, removed his shirt, and put it on the other side of a bed.
With a well-built muscular body, beautiful abs, and… many scars that would shock anyone.
Some were deep and some were very small.
As if to have fought many battles, everyone had a special story behind them.
He looked at himself in the mirror. With a disgusted look, he immediately turned back and put on a bathing cloth.
‘A beautiful face and a scar-ridden body… blessing of the world, no?’
I laughed. Though they were special, I didn’t like them much.
I wasn’t even planning to keep them for long.
As long as I had enough money to buy that special potion, I was going to erase them.
Now… I wanted to change.
Change for myself and change for the one that guided me back into this cruel world.
Though I still didn’t know what my heart wanted, what I wanted.
But, I knew. It at least wanted something.
And that was enough.
Way better than wandering aimlessly, killing unnecessary beasts, baring a meaningless hatred. Hurting myself, for no reason at all.
‘It would be better… no. Wouldn’t it be best to get hurt while protecting someone?
Someone… special.’
—Ba-dum. —Ba-dum.
This was strange. Every time I thought about her, my heart would run wild.
The way she smiles. The way she laughs.
The way she teases me. Even her soft hands and those hard fingertips.
Maybe I knew what this feeling was. Maybe I knew but, didn’t want to acknowledge it.
This strange feeling, I had heard about it.
And that was the reason… I feared it.
I somehow knew she felt this way too, and that she was waiting for me.
Waiting for me to acknowledge myself, the past, and possibly… the future.
I wasn’t strong enough to let those feelings go. I couldn’t… I can’t.
“Huuu…”
I sighed deeply as I lay in the bathtub. The warm water cleansed my body and removed the fatigue.
“Can I do that? Am I good enough? It will be ok… right?”
My mind was a mess.
Tomorrow is the day of departure. Maybe… this trip will give me some insight into my heart?
“Tomorrow…”
I closed my eyes. The heat of the water was perfect to take a small nap.
Then suddenly, a cold shiver ran down his spine.
This type of thing only happened when someone was thinking about you.
Well, that was what people said anyways.
But then, a thought crossed my mind.
‘Could it be miss Nolen? Then am I really right about… well, forget it.
It might just be a coincidence.’
I shook my head and got out of the tub.
Now that my nap was interrupted, I had to check everything last time.
I came out and put new pair of clothes. Confirming that everything was perfect, I sat down on the bed.
Looking out of the window, I spotted the bright blue moon coming out of some gray clouds.
It looked beautiful but, still… lonely.
It had many large craters but it still shined brightly.
He was alone but, he didn’t reject the company of faraway stars.
Lonely but… happy.
He gave happiness to those who had someone.
He cheered them. It was cheering for me too.
Thinking this… gave me more courage.