I responded faster than the blink of an eye. I waved my hand to brush it off and said: “Don’t look at me. I’m not her eldest nephew.”
I wasn’t lying. Based on our seniority rankings, my shifu should be her eldest nephew…
Shen Yiren looked at us with suspicion, and said: “How many relatives do you have in your family? Did they all come here?
Junior shiyi shrugged, pointed at me and said: “It doesn’t matter how many relatives I have. The point is, he’s in charge of handling my issues.” Her tone carried a hint of dependency, making my heart throb.
Wait, wait, wait! This isn’t the time for you to be throbbing! Come on, don’t sell me out now!”
Shen Yiren glanced at me and said in an overbearing tone: “You? You’re going to meddle in my business?”
What do you want me to do about it? You have to stand aside even if you’re her future boss. It’s my junior shiyi we’re talking about here. I looked at the big-boobed beauty with a sad expression.
I said in a serious, painful, brave and righteous tone: “In any case, my aunt doesn’t want to work for Liu Shan Men. This is our problem. I won’t cause you any trouble. If you insist on making us compensate you, then… I’m willing to join Liu Shan Men and slave away for you to make it up to you!”
Shen Yiren paused for a moment and then cussed: “Get fucked! You came here to take the recruitment exams, and now you think you can talk your way in? You’re slyer than a fox.”
Damn it! At least I tried.
Tch!
“What do you want me to do then? My aunt never signed anything, so it’s not like you can stop her from leaving. Gugu, leave first, I’ll handle things here. Worst comes to worst, I’ll work as a slave for you…”
Shen Yiren looked like she lost it as she said: “Shut up! Have you still not given up on trying to get in using backdoor methods?! Miss Ming, you’re a rare talent that we would love to have. I can raise your salary ten-times if you like. If there are no problems, then could we sign an agreement now?”
TEN-TIMES?! 700 SILVER INGOTS A MONTH?!
Junior shiyi laughed out loud and said: “Forget ten-times, even if you were to pay me twenty-times… Feizhen! What are you doing standing behind her?”
Eh?
Oh yeah, when did I get behind her?
Hearing Junior shiyi’s threatening tone, my legs automatically walked my back to her side. But seven hundred silver ingots plus the end of year bonus is tens of thousands silver ingots. I could build my extravagant-dream-estate with that!
Right at that a moment, a clear voice said: “Don’t be like that, sis. Maybe she really has problems to deal with. Miss Ming, please don’t hesitate to tell us why you want to quit. If there is an issue, we would be happy to help, and you can join Liu Shan Men afterwards. Wouldn’t that be perfect?”
The person who spoke out was a young maiden who was an absolute beauty. She looked like the spitting image of Shen Yiren. Are they sisters? The problem was, she was a disappointment below the neck… Starting from below the neck, she was as flat as a board. She had large eyes, but her chest region was non-existent. She spoke with a much softer tone than the domineering vice-captain. How could two sisters be so different?
But I must say, having two beautiful sisters standing next to each other is very pleasing to the eye.
Junior shiyi used the move I used before to speak directly to me without anyone else hearing: “Fei Zhen, help me.” I looked at her with a confused look to say: “Why should I?”
She glared back at me to say: “If I get to the final round and then walk off, they’ll take offence to it. Liu Shan Men aren’t pushovers.”
Why are you trying to reach the finals in the first place…?
And I don’t want her to reach the finals either. If she did, we’d have to face off against each other…
I coughed, looked back at them and said with a tragic tone: “We just received some sad news from home. My shifu, I mean my aunt’s eldest nephew passed away.”
Shifu, I swear I’m not cursing you!
I clenched my fists and said with all the sincerity I could muster: “While he was on his death-bed, he said he wanted to see my aunt or else he wouldn’t die in peace, so my aunt needs to head back to attend the funeral. At the very least, she needs to make the three bows at his grave and send him her final words.”
“He died? How old is your nephew? How did he die?”
I answered frankly: “Syphillis.”
Shen Yiren took a big step back and said with disgust: “Eeek! Stay away from me.”
Shifu, I swear I’m not cursing you.
Shen Yiren quickly regained her composure and said: “Do you think I’m stupid? Would you be here taking part in the exams if he actually died?”
“A pigeon delivered the message to us just now.”
“Where’s the pigeon then?”
“I grilled it and ate it already.”
“Where’s the letter then?”
“The pigeon ate it.”
“You’re just going to play dumb with me, aren’t you?!” Shen Yiren’s beautiful eyes started to form tears of anger. Her eyes which were meant to be filled with love became filled with bloodthirst. I don’t know why, but all the examiners took a big step back and covered their groins. What’s going on…?
“Don’t try and bullshit me. If you leave after passing two rounds, you’re going to mess up our arrangements. You’re not going anywhere!”
“I don’t care. My aunt has to attend the funeral so she’ll be leaving no matter what. Your arrangements are your problem.”
Shen Yiren’s “younger sister” laughed naively after hearing our conversation. It was like she lightened the heavy atmosphere a little. Those sick-perverted examiners took a deep breath as though they were trying to catch the air she breathed out… Hey! Stop it already, you sickos!
The younger “sister” said with a smile: “You heard her, sis. Miss Ming has an urgent matter to attend to. Miss Ming, go ahead and attend to your matters first. You can come back after, and the terms my sister promised you will remain effective.”
“Stay out of it, Kuang.” She looked at her “sister” awkwardly with a hint of panic. Our crappy lie failed to work on her, but worked on her naive “younger sister.” By the way, what was the “younger sister’s” name again? Kuang? Kuang? Kuang?* I’m a little confused myself…
I hit my chest with confidence, and said: “My aunt isn’t going to participate in the next round. Who’s her opponent? I’ll take them on!”
“You?!” Before I could finish what I wanted to say, a blue shadow appeared. Well look who it is. If it isn’t Master Liu…
“Trash, how dare you disrespect the vice-captain like that? I Liu Yuan, will teach you a lesson to appease her on behalf of Liu Shan Men!”
…You just want to silence me, don’t you?
Glossary
*Same pronunciation but different characters.