Chapter 102 Your Sorrow Is Your Own Problem
Zuo Xiaolan and Ye Nantian’s expressions changed right after hearing Ye Ci’s words. They glared at her, wishing that they could make her swallow her words.
Bai Mo was shocked as well. In his eyes, Ye Ci was a little brat. Since when did she learn to say such things?
Tan Polang, of course, heard her words as well. His hand that was holding the chopsticks trembled. He then raised his head and glared at Ye Ci with an expression full of sorrow and some hints of anger as well. The despair in his eyes were gone, replaced by a fury threatening to explode.
His expression reminded Ye Ci of how she felt when her parents died in her last life. She seemed to have had the same behavior as well. Ye Ci pursed her lips and placed more food into Tan Polang’s bowl, “Eat, eat. Then you can have the strength to cry, to be as sorrowful as you want. Where would you find the strength to do all of that if you’re hungry?”
Tan Polang stood up abruptly after listening to Ye Ci’s words. His body trembled, and his anger appeared to be at its peak. Despite that, he remained quiet as he glared at Ye Ci with his bloodshot eyes that were filled with anger. If looks could kill, Ye Ci would’ve been dead.
“Why are you looking at me?” Ye Ci narrowed her eyes and smiled. It was a smile that did not reach her eyes.
The boy could not stand her provocation any longer. He set down his chopsticks, pushed aside his chair, and dashed out of the house.
“Polang! Polang!” Zuo Xiaolan immediately shouted after him, “Bai Mo! Quick! Follow and check on him!”
Bai Mo was stunned by the sudden turn of events. He sprang into action and chased after Tan Polang when Zuo Xiaolan shouted at him.
“You damned brat! How could you say that!? Don’t you know what happened to his family?” Zuo Xiaolan, who was thoroughly angered, slapped Ye Ci. “How could you do that as a sister? Why are you making fun of somebody else’s misfortune?”
Ye Nantian knew that Zuo Xiaolan had lost control of her temper, and he immediately held her back, “Honey, you have to calm down.” He the gave Ye Ci a meaningful look, “Damned brat, why are you still standing over there? Go after him! What if he gets lost or something?”
Ye Ci mumbled an affirmation under her breath and slowly walked away. She did not even take Zuo Xiaolan’s cussing seriously. She let out a sigh. What an egoistic boy.
Tan Polang had not eaten well for days, and Ye Ci had heard about it from Bai Mo. Because of that, she knew that Tan Polang would not be able to get far.
She walked downstairs slowly, then pulled out her phone and called Bai Mo. After confirming that Bai Mo had caught up with the kid and that they were at the park, Ye Ci headed to the place slowly. She could see the two sitting on a bench from afar, and Bai Mo was consoling Tan Polang like a caring older brother. It did not work out well. He was totally being ignored by the kid.
Ye Ci turned around and walked towards a beef noodles restaurant nearby and ordered 2 bowls of noodles. She instructed the employees to deliver the noodles to the park, and left. As she approached the Bai Mo and Tan Polang, Bai Mo, who heard her footsteps, turned to look at her. She smiled and said, “Bai Mo, you can head back first.”
“Uh?” Bai Mo was baffled, “Why are you here?”
“So I’m not allowed to come here? You head home, or there’ll be no dishes left for you.” Said Ye Ci who was standing behind Bai Mo with a calm expression.
Just as Bai Mo was about to open his mouth, Ye Ci shook her head, and he immediately understood her intention. Sometimes, the person who hung the bell on the tiger’s neck must untie it [1]. Bai Mo stood up, patted Tan Polang on the head, and left.
Ye Ci sat down after Bai Mo left. She stared up into the sky, remaining silent. The weather would be perfect, if not for the cold. The chilly winds were like tiny knives slicing across Ye Ci’s face.
Tan Polang glanced at Ye Ci and immediately wanted to stand up and leave, but was surprised by Ye Ci’s sudden words, “With that scrawny body of yours, you’d definitely fall flat on your face before you could get far.”
Tan Polang’s body trembled. Ye Ci was not sure if it was out of his anger or because of the cold. Even Ye Ci who was wearing a sweater was trembling in the cold, not to mention a kid in thin clothing. After a long moment of silence, Tan Polang could no longer hold himself back, and his anger finally erupted, “Do you have something against me?”
“Nope.”
“Have I done anything to offend you?”
Ye Ci glanced at him sideways, “Not yet.”
“Then why are you bullying me? Is it because I’m an orphan now?” The wimpy kid was finally thoroughly angered. He was originally angry because he was bullied by Ye Ci. Ye Ci’s indifferent tone just added fuel to the fire. The attitude that Ye Ci was treating him with was the last straw that broke the camel’s back.
Ye Ci did not utter a single word, and instead continued staring silently at Tan Polang.
When somebody ignored your anger, it was like throwing a punch at a sack of cotton. It was obvious that Tan Polang would feel frustrated because of that, “So what if I’ve lost my parents? I didn’t do shit! Yes, I’m an orphan! So I’m not welcomed in your house? Did you feel that I’ll be stealing away your parents or something? Let me tell you! I don’t even want to be here! I’m here because of your meddlesome mother! Do you think I want to be here? Do you think I like to lodge underneath somebody else’s roof?”
Tan Polang’s voice became hoarser and hoarser as he shouted out his frustration. He had even began to sob. Although he was a boy, at that moment, his face was filled with tears.
Ye Ci however, remained silent and continued watching him. Her face betrayed no emotion. The little brat was still cursing and shouting and sobbing. At that point, he was sweating profusely. It was as if he was tormenting himself. Right at that moment, the boss of the noodle restaurant delivered two lunchboxes filled with beef noodles. The reddish soup was very appealing.
Ye Ci paid the boss, and began slurping down the noodles after placing another lunch box beside Tan Polang.
After a few days of not eating well, and with his earlier fit of anger earlier on, Tan Polang’s tummy was grumbling. He can’t help but swallowed visibly as he observed Ye Ci slurping down her noodles. In his mind, Ye Ci was his enemy. He must not give in.
However, the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. Tan Polang’s was betrayed by his rumbling tummy. This placed him in a desperate situation. He expected Ye Ci to make fun of him, but she did not even raise her head, and merely said in a light tone, “This restaurant’s beef noodles are nice. Their food is way better than mine. It’d be a shame if you waste it just like that.”
Tan Polang had an urge to give in to his hunger, but did not do so out of fear of “losing face”. He snorted and remained still. A chilly wind blew past, and he began trembling.
“You’re a guy. Act like one. If you want to eat, just do it. But you have to pay for it after you eat.” Ye Ci was still eating the noodles without even looking at Tan Polang.
Tan Polang tried his hardest to resist, but he was unable to withstand the constant protest of his rumbling tummy. He gritted his teeth and began slurping down the noodles as well.
For a moment, the only sound in the park was that of the two of them slurping their noodles.
“Having lost your parents is indeed sad.” Said Ye Ci as she was eating her noodles. She caught a glimpse of Tan Polang’s hand trembling and continued, “But, that sorrow belongs to you alone. It has nothing to do with anyone else.”
It was Tan Polang’s turn to remain silent. He was immersed in eating the noodles.
“Everybody has a sob story. But do you really need to proclaim it to the world? Wasn’t that just asking for sympathy?” Ye Ci laughed grimly as she looked into the distance, remembering herself in her last life, “You don’t need to look for sympathy. Nobody would understand your sorrows. No matter how sad and how tragic your story is, it will always be ‘somebody else’s matter’ in the eye of another person. They can sympathize with you, and they can feel sorry about it. Heck, they can even enjoy watching your suffering. But who would truly care about it?”
“I did not show it openly!” Tan Polang protested while he was still stuffing noodles into his mouth.
“Aren’t you doing it right now?” Ye Ci laughed, “It’s okay to feel sad, but only in moderation. If you overdo it, you’ll go apathetic before long.”
“I’m not a child anymore! Of course I know!” Tan Polang thought that Ye Ci was still having a go at him, “I don’t need you to tell me that!”
Ye Ci was not angry. She knew how he felt.
“Sometimes, some sorrows should be hidden in your heart. It’s a precious emotion. You don’t get to experience it often in your life. You must learn restraint.” And with that, Ye Ci gulped down the last of her noodles and washed it down with the soup, “Everybody is busy. They don’t have the time or energy to spare on somebody else’s happiness or sorrow. This is why you must not trouble others with such matters.”
“You must learn in order to grow.” Ye Ci let out a sigh, as if she was her past self. Her despicable past self who was full of scars, “Try to be more cheerful.”
“I’m alone from now on.” Tan Polang spoke up after a long moment of silence. It was apparent that he no longer loathed Ye Ci as much. Or at least his words were way more gentle now.
Ye Ci did not want to stir Polang’s emotion any further. She patted his head and said, “Don’t you have us?”
The beef noodles were spicy and hot, making it uncomfortable. Tan Polang’s tears were flowing freely at this point, and he couldn’t see clearly. The boy sniffled, wiped his face with his sleeves and said, “I don’t have money to pay for the noodles.”
“Well I’ll lend some to you. You can repay me later.”
“You’re annoying.”
“You don’t seem to be a very likeable person either.”
Translator’s Note:
1. The person who hung the bell on the tiger’s neck must untie it: 解铃终须系铃人
A head monk once asked his students, “How does one untie a bell that was tied around a tiger’s neck?” which one of them answered, “Only the person who tied the bell can untie it.” Moral of the story, boys and girls, you’re the only who can sort your own shit out.